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Confused...
Linnea Ren
Posted: Monday, January 13, 2014 1:15 AM

...and a little annoyed.

 

 

I posted my first book on here yesterday morning, the full thing at 110,500 words, and got a review late last night. I was surprised, considering how long the story is and how much time and effort it takes to fully critique a story of length, but excited anyway. What I found was a 2/5 review. Now, I was a little startled, but at the same time curious to see what the reader thought. I could see how they thought it was only a 2/5, though they only gave me general feedback, but when I read the review something became abundantly clear: they couldn't have read more than the first 500 words, which is less than half of the prologue.

 

 

I'm not sure how I feel. The things the critiquer lectured me about were done on purpose in the section he read, and if he'd read just a little bit farther, some of his complaints about action and pointlessness would be focused on. I'm not sure how to respond both to the reviewer, and to myself as a writer. Is it worth taking his advice into consideration when he wouldn't even try and finish the prologue? Or is that a testament to my ability to keep the audience hooked? This is the only time this has happened with this story, so I'm not sure what to think....

 

 

Any advice out there for me?

 

Here's a link to the book if anyone wants to look: http://www.bookcountry.com/BookDetail.aspx?BookId=6146

--edited by Linnea Ren on 1/13/2014, 1:54 AM--


Ian Nathaniel Cohen
Posted: Monday, January 13, 2014 10:54 AM

While I personally wouldn't stop at the 500 word mark before leaving my review (and I have no way of knowing if the reviewer did that or not), as a reader, if I'm noticing something problematic right from the beginning, I may get the impression that the rest of the story is going to have that same problem, and might not be inclined to read further.  I've been on the receiving end of similar feedback - although not from the same reviewer - and no matter how harsh it may be, the points are usually valid ones.  So yeah, I'd say take the hit and take notice of the gist of his advice.

 

Also, I wouldn't disregard the positive feedback he left for you either. 

 

 


Linnea Ren
Posted: Monday, January 13, 2014 11:04 AM

I know he stopped where he did because he only talks about the prologue, but he only talks about when she's alone. In fact, he makes a comment about how frustrating it is that she is alone, but at around 550 words, another person shows up and they interact. It's not that I find his critique harsh (I've been told my work is horrible and that I need to rewrite it completely, and so on), but I'm not sure how valid I can find it, considering I did most of what he complained about on purpose. 

 

But thank you for your advice. I appreciate it, and I'll store away the review and make sure to apply it to the rest of the story if I have people point out similar things where they're not supposed to be.


Lucy Silag
Posted: Monday, January 13, 2014 1:36 PM
Joined: 6/7/2013
Posts: 1356


Hi Linnea,

Ugh, I hate that feeling when you put work up for workshop and it seems like the reviewer didn't give your book enough of a chance! You've written such a long and complex draft, it must be very deflating to have the first review be such a cursory one.

 

That said, I think you got some useful feedback here. Like most readers, the reviewer quit when he lost interest. In a way, you're almost lucky, because you have that piece of data--that somewhere around 500 words, a reader decided to quit. Most writers don't get something so specific!

 

Maybe this data means that you don't need a prologue--and that this back story/history could be woven in later, once the reader is already engaged. Maybe you shouldn't risk losing your reader by spending the first five hundred words here--and instead, start in a scene, maybe a scene with very high stakes so that the reader can't help but feel compelled to at least see the scene through. That's a tactic lots of writers use. Personally, when I'm in doubt, I always start in a scene, because time and time again I hear from writers I trust that high-stakes scenes are the best way to engage a reader.

 

However, you read tons of fantasy and urban fantasy. You're the expert in what resonates as reader to you--and in those genres, mysterious prologues are common, I think. Do you respond to them when you see them in books? If so, don't forget about that as you're processing the feedback you get on Book Country. Think about the reasons YOU like prologues and what they do for the books you love. Come up with a justification for having it, then set about improving it in any way you can.

 

I took a look at the first 500 words myself, and I thought they were gorgeously written. I haven't been doing as much reviewing lately, as our community is growing so much and I've been focusing more on helping members to learn to use the site, but I can tell that this book has a lot of potential and is worth a read from Book Country members interested in Urban Fantasy. Keep at it, and I think you'll get feedback that is useful to you over time. But let yourself absorb it, analyze, and decide if you agree before using it--I'd say that goes for any advice we get in this life! I'd also wait for more feedback before making any big decisions about this draft--processing feedback takes time. (Years, I've found, for some of my projects!)

 

Nice work on being brave enough to show other writers your work. Good luck and keep in touch!


And thank you, Ian, for sharing your thoughts, too. Other BC members should definitely weigh in, too!

 

Lucy Silag

Book Country Community and Engagement Manager


Linnea Ren
Posted: Tuesday, January 14, 2014 1:34 AM

@Lucy Silag

 

Thank you for your advice! I guess a big problem is I DO need the prologue where I have it. In chapter two the events of the end of the prologue come into play and it ends up being a massive plot point for the first half of the book. If I just delete it, and start with Mia being woken up for school, a whole element of suspense is lost. To me, not everything has to start with action. Our lives are filled with moments of thought and silence, but we surpass them for the exciting because it's what we've been trained to enjoy. But just those five hundred words of the woman watching the river speak so much, especially when it's explained two books later (The First Nine is the first in a five book series). So I'm unable to remove the prologue without taking away something so important.

 

I suppose I could, once again, rewrite it and try to make the boring parts shorter, except this is the only time I've had someone complain. All ten others who've read it have said they were hooked from paragraph one, so I'm not sure :/ I suppose waiting for another review/critique would be a good idea. 

 

I'm glad you enjoyed what you read. I'm hoping the rest is just as beautifully written, because then I just might have a chance at publication. Again, then you for your advice, and for taking the time to read and reply to me. I appreciate it.

~Linnea


Lucy Silag
Posted: Tuesday, January 14, 2014 9:02 AM
Joined: 6/7/2013
Posts: 1356


Hi @Linnea! Glad my note was useful to you. I think you're bringing up really important topics, so I am glad other members will have the chance to look over this and think about how this situation relates to their own writing.

 

Sounds like you are well on your way to justifying why you need that prologue there, then!

 

I really do believe that we can't make a lot of hard and fast rules about what is and is not good writing--because great writers will break every one of those rules. I was thinking about this over the weekend about a book I was reading. When I was an MFA student everyone was so decided that you should almost always choose scene vs. summary. And as you can tell above--I pretty much agree. However--I then re-read one of my all-time favorite books, GIRL by Blake Nelson. And I realized that the whole book is written in summary. That kind of blew my mind. Then last week I tore through THE MISEDUCATION OF CAMERON POST by emily m. danforth (one of our Landmark Books in YA Contemporary) and much of this book is written in summary. But the author makes it work. So, the lesson to be learned isn't yes-to-prologue or no-to-prologue, but rather "How can I make my prologue work?" the same way these authors made summary really work for their book.

 

You know this, of course.  You're working through it--gathering data from your beta-readers (who mostly sound like they are not put off by the prologue at all) and really analyzing why you are putting things where you are in the story.

 

Keep on keeping on! This is such an important step toward finding readers and/or publication. It's really exciting to see this process happen for you!

 

Lucy

 

 



Jay Greenstein
Posted: Wednesday, January 15, 2014 12:42 AM

Okay, since you're talking about my review, and didn't see it for yourself I'll explain:

 

First, no one is going to read the entire story, or even a single chapter, unless you make them need to. And if they don't read more then a page, can you reasonably blame the reader for not being as excited by it as you hoped? You have no right to a reader's attention, you can only hope to entice them. And if you don't the fault is not with the reader.

 

When you send in a query, an acquiring editor will begin reading at the top of page one. They will read till they see the first problem and stop. That's it, your audition is over. Most end before the end of the first paragraph because the one writing it has taken n meaningful steps to learn the craft of writing fiction for the printed word.

 

 Why would anyone doing a critique, who finds major structure items in the first few paragraphs read any further? Those mistakes in approach are going to be repeated over and over again. Why would anyone want to keep pointing to the results of the same problem?  You're going to have to do a major rewrite after you acquire those missing skills.

 

Don't make the mistake of thinking the reader is with you for the story, and look for comments on story or character because the reader is with you to be entertained, not informed. They're looking for moment-to-moment reader pleasure. And if you're not giving that they'll not turn to page two, so your great plot and interesting characters will never be seen.

 

I know this seems harsh, but the simple truth is that damn little of the general skill called writing that we learn in school is of use in writing fiction for the page because we learn skills that most adults require in order to be employable. And employers require nonfiction skills whose goal is to inform. Use them to try to write fiction and you get a story that reads like a chronicle, a report on a series of events, dispassionately and accurately presented, in a fact-based and author-centric way that cannot entertain, only inform. Fiction however, is emotion based and character-centric.

 

Given that, what possible reason would there be to read any more than enough to identify the major problem? Acquiring the craft and specialized knowledge to fix that problem is going to take a fair amount of study, thought, and rewriting. And that has to come before meaningful comments on the story. After all, if someone tells you to try out the hiking trail they built and you find it has ankle-turning rocks, washouts, dangerous climbs, and hissing noises from the bushes, how much time will you spend admiring the view? And can the hiker be blamed for turning back?

 

In reality, because I wanted you to see exactly how the problem manifests and skews the reader's perceptions of the story you intended them to get I spent well over an hour of time I didn't have to give you. And I gave you two stars, because of your use of language and imagery, something I almost never do.

 

It might pay to look at it again, without steam coming out of your ears, and ask yourself why I said what I did at a given point. You might, also take a look at the resources I pointed you to. They make a huge difference. And I speak from experience, because I didn't sell my first novel until I began to realy dig into the craft of the fiction-writer.


Linnea Ren
Posted: Wednesday, January 15, 2014 12:58 AM

@Jay Greenstein

 

 

I can assure you steam is not coming out of my ears. Your review was hardly harsh, and didn't upset me at all. I found your analyzation quite excellent and I appreciate it. However, my concern is out of 11 people, you are the only one who's stopped so early on. And the things you talked about were done on purpose.

 

 

And, might I add, when you say the reader is looking for "moment-to-moment reader pleasure," you are referring to yourself. I have met many, many readers who appreciate a calm setting which brings about mystery and raises questions. The point of a urban fantasy prologue is not to explain. It's to intrigue. I have looked at your blog, and read your work, and you have a very narrowed view of what is and isn't considered excellent story telling. Which is fine. But I'm allowed to question the validity of your critique, no matter how long you spent on it, or how rare your rating is. It's my right as an author.

 

 

I'm sorry if I offended you and your knowledge of writing. It wasn't my intention. I'm merely trying to decide whether or not I should rewrite my prologue because of your advice, or question it because you are in the minority in your concerns. 

 

 

I hope you have a wonderful day. 

 

 

~Linnea

--edited by Linnea Ren on 1/15/2014, 1:00 AM--


TerminalVerbosity
Posted: Wednesday, January 15, 2014 5:55 AM
Joined: 11/11/2013
Posts: 43


This discussion intrigued me enough to read the first few pages of the story and the text of the review so that I could weigh in  

I think it's important to know that someone can give you a review that you totally disagree with and that doesn't mean that you're wrong or that the reviewer is either. That's the beauty of the written word and of human nature--both are diverse enough that there's no such thing as absolute universal appeal. There's someone out there who doesn't agree with me that every word Jane Austen wrote was gospel. There are even those who don't compulsively reread The Hunger Games as each new movie comes out. I really don't understand those people but I also can't say that they're wrong. See what I'm getting at here? 

I didn't particularly object to the first scene of The First Nine (in fact, I sorta loved this: "As she stood there...she looked almost human."), but on the other hand, I also agreed with the feedback Jay provided on the four specific quotes he pulled from that first scene--making changes to those particular bits would, in my opinion improve the pacing and evoke a more compelling first scene. So this seems to be a case where the best way forward is to agree to disagree, no?

Julie


Linnea Ren
Posted: Wednesday, January 15, 2014 12:37 PM

@TerminalVerbosity

Thank you for taking the time to reply and even read bits of the subject matter! I'll keep in mind what you said about the four quotes and jot down a note for when I work on the fourth draft. 

~Linnea


Mimi Speike
Posted: Wednesday, January 15, 2014 2:18 PM
Joined: 11/17/2011
Posts: 1016


A writer faces two challenges. The first is to grab and hold the attention of the reader, to make him/her read on long enough to get hooked by the plot. The second, obviously, is to tell a good, solid story. An author, in an interview – once again I jotted the quote but not the speaker, will I ever learn? – said: “Very distinguished writing will make me read on beyond page one, even if nothing happens. Conversely, terrible writing on page one (the case with several exciting mega-bestsellers) renders something unreadable for me.”

 

I am in the middle of Hopscotch, a rambling, highly atmospheric, fairly plotless, absolutely marvelous piece. I am enthralled with the gorgeous prose style, savoring every going-nowhere-looks-like sentence.

 

I have quite a to-read list, but your thing will go on it.


Sephira
Posted: Wednesday, January 15, 2014 4:15 PM

That is sort of how I am too - if the characters are interesting enough, or the scenes are well written enough to grab my interest, then I'll keep going - even if all they are doing is sitting around doing nothing at the time.

 

 

I'll try to do an actual review at some point, when I've had a chance to read the whole thing, but just in looking at the prologue and first chapter - I liked it. It's hard to review it though, just given the scope of it all. Wish they had it set up so that we could review by chapter, or where we could save, and then add more later as we read. That would be helpful for those of us who post longer manuscripts that can't be read in one sitting. 

 

 

On the specific issues that were cited - as far as needing to know "what she was looking for"....  probably nothing, and there's nothing wrong with that. Maybe because it's something that I've done any number of times, but it seems perfectly normal for someone who is deep in thought, especially when highly stressed, or in a difficult situation to stare at something, seemingly intently focused - but really not actually looking at anything (or for anything). Which is what I assumed the author was going for in this case. So if anything, maybe find a way to clarify that there isn't a purpose behind it, other than deep thoughts (if that is what you were going for), or if there is a purpose - even if it's something we aren't given to know at this time, still find some small way to convey that she is waiting for something/someone. 

 

As to describing the water, I think that is fine too, because yeah water can do that, but honestly there are any number of other ways water can behave as well, depending on the weather, or the type of water, etc... so that it was sort of a lazy sort of movement (especially if it's potentially relevant, or helps to set the scene) seems like a good thing to know. 

With the fish thing, maybe just mention that she watched them sink back into the depths then, taking a deep breath, returned to her vigil.

 

 

--edited by Sephira on 1/15/2014, 4:19 PM--


Jay Greenstein
Posted: Thursday, January 16, 2014 2:26 AM

• And the things you talked about were done on purpose.

Why you did it matters not at all, because when you hand your words to someone else you, your intent, and everything about you becomes irrelevant. It’s the words you choose and what they mean to that reader. Each of the things I mentioned would, in and of itself, have resulted in a rejection. And that’s the judgment of someone who owned a manuscript critiquing service. It was my business to know what wouldn’t sell and why.

• And, might I add, when you say the reader is looking for "moment-to-moment reader pleasure," you are referring to yourself.

No, I’m not. Your reader arrives on page one with only mild curiosity, which will quickly fade unless you change that to active interest. Studies have shown that the average reader, choosing a book, will stop reading in three pages or less unless you hook them and keep them hooked. And in that time one single line that bores or confuses will end your audition. Never forget that the reader is looking for entertainment. Fail to provide that, moment-to-moment and it’s over.

In the words of Sol Stein, “A novel is like a car—it won’t go anywhere until you turn on the engine. The “engine” of both fiction and nonfiction is the point at which the reader makes the decision not to put the book down. The engine should start in the first three pages, the closer to the top of page one the better.”

• I have met many, many readers who appreciate a calm setting which brings about mystery and raises questions.

But you’ve done neither. Confusion isn’t mystery. And raising questions you didn’t intend to raise, through not supplying context will result in the cover closing.

• But I'm allowed to question the validity of your critique, no matter how long you spent on it, or how rare your rating is. It's my right as an author.

You can question anything, and ignore everything I said. It hurts me not at all. But you should be doing that based on a knowledge of the craft of the writer, not personal belief. What I said was based on what’s taught in professional fiction writing courses. They aren’t my opinions or beliefs. So you’re not questioning my words, you’re rejecting those of people like Jack Bickham, who not only taught professional fiction writing for decades, he wrote and sold seventy-five novels.

Bear in mind that I haven't told you how to write. I've only pointed out what's not working, and why, then pointed you toward reliable sources of professional knowledge. If you expect to be seen as a serious writer, doesn't it make sense to spend a bit of money and some study time in your writer’s education? Every profession requires study and mentoring, even testing. You didn't graduate high school as a historian or mathematician, in spite of having taken classes on the subject. All the TV watching over the years hasn't made you a screenwriter. Why believe that English class and reading fiction for pleasure have given you a professional level of knowledge of the profession of writing fiction for the printed word?

 
• It wasn't my intention. I'm merely trying to decide whether or not I should rewrite my prologue because of your advice, or question it because you are in the minority in your concerns. 

 
Ask yourself how many of the others are making their suggestions from the seat of a published author. Check how many of them owned a manuscript critiquing service as I did. The last person to ask how to write for publication is someone who has not been able to achieve publication. If they knew they would be selling their work.


Linnea Ren
Posted: Thursday, January 16, 2014 2:36 AM

@Jay Greenstein

 

I will say two things because I'm tired of being talked down to. First, you speak as though there is only one kind of reader, and I would appreciate it if you would stop telling me there is, because I know otherwise. Second, out of the 11 people who've read the prologue, one was you, four were friends of mine, three were professional editors, one was a licensed publisher, and two are published authors. Maybe you've heard of them: Victoria Hanley and Patrick Jones? Both have published multiple books and both have gained success. So yes, I have gotten advice from published authors and many others in the field of publication. 

 

 

That is all. Thank you again for your time and review. But if you're going to lecture me anymore I will argue against you and it won't be pretty. I would like this thread to stay civil. If you have anything more to say, I'd rather it stay in private messages so others do not have to witness this debate.

 

 

~Linnea

--edited by Linnea Ren on 1/16/2014, 2:37 AM--


Perry
Posted: Thursday, January 16, 2014 10:32 AM
Joined: 9/17/2013
Posts: 104


This thread had me hooked right from the first few lines.

 

I'm afraid if it goes much further, it will turn into a total train wreck.

 

Here's my take, for what little it is worth.

 

Linnea has put a ton of work into a MS of 110,500 words. She's proud of the book, and doesn't like a negative review from someone who hasn't read past the first few pages. I wouldn't like that review either, if it was my book.

 

Jay is right. Our hard work is regulary discarded by publishers if we can't hook them in the first pages. I heard the prinicpals of a highly regarded small regional publishing house speak to an audience of writers. The group was shocked and deflated to learn that for the thirty titles they publish every year, they discard thousands of submissions. The publishers can't read all those precious manuscripts; they have college undergraduates look at them. The student interns follow strict guidelines, and they don't read the whole book either.

 

I have a friend who read a piece of short fiction in a writing class, and he was roundly panned by the instructor. He was PO'd, he stuck with his story and won a prestigious statewide fiction prize with the piece. The instructor didn't have all the answers after all.

 

Much more common among my writing friends are those who submit pretty good MSS to publishers, and the publisher shows interest but wants revisions. The author refuses to listen, because she knows what's best. The book never sees print, and the author eventually admits that but for her pride she might have started her published writing career years earlier.


Mimi Speike
Posted: Thursday, January 16, 2014 11:06 AM
Joined: 11/17/2011
Posts: 1016


Everyone has their line in the sand, and everyone has to decide where that line is. And everyone has to figure out how to get the reader reading and keep him/her reading. Expectations have something to do with that, an intriguing synopsis. A riveting style is the ultimate hook.
Linnea Ren
Posted: Thursday, January 16, 2014 11:07 AM

I'd like to clear something up right here, right now. I don't care that the review was negative. I care that only 500 hundred words were read. Were it a 5/5, all praise with a few things here or there but just about the first five hundred words, I'd still be questioning the validity. I know it sounds like I'm upset because it wasn't positive after all my hard work, but like I've said before, it's not the worst I've gotten and I'd rather have honesty then praise. However, due to how little was read, I don't know if I can take it seriously. I'd say the same thing (in fact I'd be more suspicious of it) if it were a positive review.

 

 

So please, stop assuming I'm just an angry author who's hurt because my "baby" was talked bad about. If it were a negative review about the first two chapters as well, I'd be alright with that. After a prologue and two chapters, the reader can get more than just a small, insignificant view of the writing style.

 

 

The reason I am getting frustrated in this thread is because people are assuming that I actually like my work and will defend it to the ends of the earth. Quite the opposite. I hate it and getting constructive criticism makes me feel better because it means I'm not alone in my thoughts, as long as there's indisputable evidence and a clear reason for said feedback. Multiple people have said they were intrigued, curious, and wanting to read more, not only as readers in the age group I'm writing for, but also published authors, professional editors, and a publisher herself. My logical assumption, combined with a confusion as to why no more than 500 words were read, especially since I never review unless I read at least three chapters, is what's causing me to question this. Not because I'm hurt. Not because I don't like negative reviews.

 

 

So please, can we stop talking about this topic as though I were an angry author? I honestly don't know if I should listen to the reviewer, or go with everyone else who has read it. If it really is boring and no one will read it, I want to change it. I'm just not sure that's true based on testimony from a multitude of others.

 

 

Thank you.

 

 

~Linnea

--edited by Linnea Ren on 1/16/2014, 11:11 AM--


Jay Greenstein
Posted: Thursday, January 16, 2014 12:23 PM

 

• I'd like to clear something up right here, right now. I don't care that the review was negative. I care that only 500 hundred words were read.

In the fourth paragraph of my comments, just after I told you that my comments weren't about your talent or potential, I said:

 You're explaining and detailing the situation you visualize happening. And that cannot work for several reasons. First, because the words on the page are the exact words you would use to tell it to me in person. Unfortunately, verbal storytelling is a performance art, and the all-important emotional component—the part the reader comes for—is carried by nonverbal means. Your voice would be filled with emotion—could I but hear it. There would be meaningful pauses, emphasis, and more. Added to that, could the reader only see it, your expression would illustrate that of the protagonist. Your gestures would visually punctuate. And body language would amplify and provide amplification and moderation, making the performance complete.

How much of that translates to the page? None.”


Virtually half the new writer manuscripts have that same problem, because it’s the only kind of storytelling we know when we begin to write our stories. And it is a career killer so it must be addressed first, because until it is the rejection will come on page one. What else is there to say? Must I read three chapters and talk about things that will and must be rewritten because of the single overriding problem of using techniques that can’t work on the page?
 
• First, you speak as though there is only one kind of reader, and I would appreciate it if you would stop telling me there is, because I know otherwise.

Until it sells you only believe otherwise.

But I notice that you’ve not discussed, mentioned, or asked for clarification of one single point I raised. No, “Why did you say that?” Just “you’re a big doo-doo head and my friends all liked it.”  Seems more an emotional than a studied reaction.

You have editors and published writers telling you it’s okay and Jay says you need to change your approach? Okay, I’m wrong and it will sell, of course. Why are you wasting time trying to change my mind?

You came come here and opened a thread complaining that I, specifically, found reason for an editor to reject you on the first page, as if a reader or acquiring editor has an obligation to read the entire piece before rendering an opinion. And you did that instead of dismissing the critique or contacting me with questions. Seems to me that anything that calls up such a strong emotional reaction should be looked into a bit more deeply, and dispassionately than you have. After all, if I’m right, I’ve done you a great service.

 

 Just to prove me wrong, you might dig up a copy of Jack Bickham’s book. It’s free at the public library. Take the time to read the thoughts of an Honored Professor of professional fiction writing and you’ll have your answer as to if I’m right or wrong—and perhaps a bit of craft and knowledge those helpful friends didn’t mention.

“It ain’t what you don’t know that gets you into trouble. It’s what you know for sure that just ain’t so.”
 ~ Mark Twain









Lucy Silag
Posted: Thursday, January 16, 2014 12:49 PM
Joined: 6/7/2013
Posts: 1356


Hi everybody,

 

Just want to jump in here and see if we can't take a breather and redirect the conversation before it gets too personal.

 

Above I wrote about the benefits a BC member can get from a review from an excerpt of only 500 words. Of course reviewing the entire manuscript is also helpful to the writer. All honest feedback can be helpful, so long as its polite, clear, and follows the Community Guidelines.

 

Almost every learning process has moments of deep, deep discomfort. This is okay--this is how you know you are learning.

 

I think this thread is a really good illustration of how it feels to be "written off" as a writer. It might be the way the real world works, but that doesn't mean it's not painful, baffling, or frustrating. Hearing how Linnea is working through this, really trying to be heard and understood not only in her writing but also to understand the feedback that was given, inspires me to really clarify feedback and articulate how I respond to the work. This is hard because I don't like every writer's work--I just don't. I'm a human with preferences. But because I have been at the place where Linnea is--really confused about the feedback I've gotten, and feeling like my work has been dismissed without a chance--I'm always striving to make sure to really empathize with the writer I am reading, and to present my feedback with that extra bit of care toward explaining it very carefully.

 

Book Country members are so good at giving this type of detailed, specific feedback, sticking with manuscripts that might need a new beginning, middle, or end (in their opinion). As you are writing a review, please don't forget what a big difference it will make to pay some extra attention to how your feedback will be read by a writer who's really putting themself out there, trying to get better.

 

Let's also keep in mind that everyone reviews differently, too. Some reviews are strident, some come with object lessons about craft, some are very short and to the point, and some are full of emoticons and exclamation points. Some aren't even in full sentences. That's okay (again, with the caveat that you must adhere to the Community Guidelines linked above). We need to make sure that every member on BC feels like they can give candid feedback in their own voice.

 

If you have questions or concerns, please email me at lucy at bookcountry dot com, or send me a private message. I'm happy to chat about any of this and help air it out.

 

Lucy Silag

Book Country Community and Engagement Manager

 

--edited by Lucy Silag on 1/16/2014, 1:03 PM--


Lucy Silag
Posted: Thursday, January 16, 2014 12:51 PM
Joined: 6/7/2013
Posts: 1356


In the name of redirecting this conversation, I wanted to pose the following question to the rest of the BC community:

 

What do you do to cheer up/chill out/refocus after a piece of disappointing or confusing feedback?


--edited by Lucy Silag on 1/16/2014, 12:51 PM--


Julie Artz
Posted: Thursday, January 16, 2014 1:10 PM
Joined: 11/11/2013
Posts: 43


I may become a beast on the football pitch after the stress of a rejection or critical review

In the absence of a scheduled game, I eat some chocolate (if it's early in the day) or have a glass of wine (if it's later), and whine to my husband about how unfair the world is.

In either scenario, I get it all out of my system and then sit back down and try to find the nuggets of truth in the review. It's usually there, even if I don't want it to be. 


Perry
Posted: Thursday, January 16, 2014 1:49 PM
Joined: 9/17/2013
Posts: 104


 

"What do you do to cheer up / chill out / refocus after a piece of disappointing or confusing feedback?"

 

 

I was putting the finishng touches on my second short story collection when I gave half of the stories to a woman I respected and asked her to comment. After reading the stories, she gave me a pretty heavy dose of advice on what needed to be improved. Publication was delayed for eight months while I revised most of the stories, and the book came out in December to good reviews from my niche readership. I'm glad that I swallowed hard and listened to her.

 

At a club meeting last week I was approached by a man who said he read the whole book over several nights, sitting by his fireplace with a glass of scotch in his hand. He enjoyed the stories immensely, he said, and laid on the praise. Then he said I had lost him in a part of the second to the last story, that this wasn't right or that didn't seen to make sense. What could I do? The stories were already published. I told him that he should drink more scotch.


Linnea Ren
Posted: Thursday, January 16, 2014 1:52 PM
I ask other people what they think. Preferably people who've read the story and know what they're talking about. Often my close friends who will be honest with me and will tell me if the negative review is spot on, or if they don't believe it. Sometimes I ask people on a writing site what they think. I don't like to make decisions alone based on what I think, and what I think only. I'm only one person with one view, and I know that since I'm close to the writing, I can't be 100% objectional. So I reach out to others for advice, as I tried to do in this thread.
Jay Greenstein
Posted: Thursday, January 16, 2014 10:57 PM

When I get comments I do several things:

First, I park my ego at the door. “It sucks,” is a perfectly valid criticism so long as the one saying it explains why.

Then, point by point, I look to see if I agree with the observations. Too damn often they’re right. And that’s good because I’d rather they find it than the publisher I submit to.

If I disagree I try to figure out what, in the prose, drove them to make the comment, because obviously, the writing didn’t do its job at that spot. What they said/suggested isn’t nearly as important as the fact that something kicked them out of the story. And if I can fix that without losing other readers I’m ahead.

I also look at the writing of the one making a suggestion to see what their advice looks like when applied to their own writing.

In general, I’m not upset because I’m not looking for praise, and I don’t care if the advice is snarled at me or couched in gentle tones, so long as it’s not a praise sandwich, with meaningless attaboys bracketing the actual critique. Those I hate.

Shel Silverstein had an interesting viewpoint. He pointed out that if you accept praise without question you have no choice but to accept criticism with exactly the same enthusiasm. Kind of puts things into perspective.


Ian Nathaniel Cohen
Posted: Friday, January 17, 2014 10:49 PM

After I go over the feedback, I tend to make an instant beeline for the manuscript and go into single-minded "fix it fix it fix it" mode.  If I have it posted somewhere or being read over by someone else, I may even yank it out of circulation so someone doesn't waste time reviewing an obsolete version that's already in the process of being fixed up.  I actually did that with The Brotherhood of the Black Flag here on Book Country after a couple of "not what I'd hoped for" reviews, and put the story back up once I'd fixed it up and addressed the issues.

 

I should mention I'm more inclined to do this with style, structure, and exposition trimming.  With plot points people disagree with, I'm more likely to look those over and see there's a way for them to make more sense in context, but I'll otherwise leave things as is, especially if only one out of a bunch comments on it.  One - and only one - Black Flag reviewer suggested having something happen during the main character's voyage to Jamaica, which isn't shown at all.  Not only have I never been able to think of anything to happen on said voyage that wouldn't be a total cliche, but I just thought it would be superfluous and unnecessary, not to mention a pacing-killer, so I left it as is.


DJS
Posted: Friday, January 24, 2014 8:38 AM
Linnea: I was honored to review a sampling of your work. Given that most reviews are subjective, you must nevertheless listen carefully to that point of view even when you adamantly disagree. I've read reviews that amounted to pure flattery, when honest opinion was required. I've also read reviews that seemed more concerned with the quality of the review, offering scant enlightenment to the beseeching writer. Too much of the posted writing is imitative and undisciplined and gimmicky, a phase most writers not blessed with genius undergo. During this inchoate period we tend to overwrite, heaping our prose with adjectives and adverbs that only interfere with the careful brushstrokes of creativity. When right out of the gate a book is in obvious need of extensive editing, it's nearly impossible to wade through a long manuscript. More often than not a prologue and first chapter will be quite enough to evaluate the complete work; although some writers, getting over the jitters of the opening scenes, will make quantum leaps of improvement in subsequent chapters. Rather than succumb to a fit of pique because someone-- qualified or not-- didn't like your work, you must write another draft, cutting and whacking excessive verbiage and cleansing sentences of awkward construction, and then submitting the re-write to some competent and merciless proofreader who, unlike family members and friends, will render an honest verdict of what you've composed. Better to get the bad writing out of your system early on, before some crusty editor lowers the boom and sends you cascading into the depths of despair. From where I sit, you have the right stuff to become a successful author, but only if your editing skills become as sharp as your writing skills.
TheresaReel
Posted: Monday, February 3, 2014 6:15 PM
Joined: 10/7/2013
Posts: 65


Sounds familiar.  There are two different schools of thought on prologues:  I believe they can be used to set the mood/atmosphere.  However, some people are rabidly anti-prologue.  Also, unless you are writing an action-adventure screenplay, I see no need to jump immediately into action.  If you are comfortable with how you decided to write the story, I say, stick to your guns.  You can't please every reader all the time.  Just because one reader wasn't immediately hooked, doesn't mean the next reader won't be.  All this "hook" business concerns me a little bit.  Even a "hook" can work for one reader, but turn another reader off.  I wouldn't worry too much about one critique.  Wait until you have five or more and then check to see if there is any type of agreement between them.
TheresaReel
Posted: Monday, February 3, 2014 6:23 PM
Joined: 10/7/2013
Posts: 65


Personally, I go for a nice, long walk and think about what was said.  Then I take a few days to decide if I want to take it to heart--(it's YOUR story; no one else's; tell it how you want to).  Then, I try to make the changes, or decide to ignore the "helpful" advice.  Also, I just want to say that many agents are too narrow in their outlook.  They want formulas that sell.  They claim to want something "new" but really want something very close to a name-brand author they know sells.  I see a huge market for self-publishing and writers who are also savvy marketers.
TheresaReel
Posted: Monday, February 3, 2014 6:42 PM
Joined: 10/7/2013
Posts: 65


P.S.--I just looked at your prologue and truly enjoyed it.  And I felt it was compelling enough to read further.  Unfortunately, teen's just aren't my cup of tea.  But I know there are other readers who enjoy reading about that age group.  Plus, things written about this age group are very marketable and can even end up being turned into film.  I think you are on to something.
Linnea Ren
Posted: Monday, February 3, 2014 6:59 PM

Theresa,

Thank you for looking at it, and I understand. The age group of this is definitely teenagers and young adults. While the characters are 18-20 in the books, there are a lot of mature themes, especially when it comes to the demons themselves who are older than earth itself, but still the age range won't change.


 

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