RSS Feed Print
Nervous about sharing
DianaRoseWilson
Posted: Tuesday, July 21, 2015 8:42 PM
Joined: 7/21/2015
Posts: 92


So, I am coming out to state that I write Erotica.  But, I'm feeling very uncertain about this coming out.  What are thoughts regarding sharing Erotica and being open about what you're writing?  I'm thankful it's more acceptable and accepted now, but I haven't really embraced being open about the naughty writing I'm doing.  I also don't want to write with a pen name, my options might be limited, I may need to just step out and fly my freak flag proud.  Any feedback would be great. How did you do it? (Or how are you doing it?)
Amber J. Wolfe
Posted: Tuesday, July 21, 2015 11:48 PM

Hi, Diana. I see you're new, so welcome to Book Country

 

I don't write Erotica--though Erotic Romance is one of my most favorite genres to read--but I feel our situations are the same--being frightened to show our work because of what our family/friends/others might think. I have many Christian family members I dread to let see my manuscripts. Like my WIP Destiny's Bond, Volume One of my Dark Destinies Trilogy. It has heavy themes of horror in it, as well as planned sexual romance later in Volume II and III. With Christian family members, those are both themes that they'd frown upon, though maybe not the horror aspects so much as the sexuality.

 

Luckily, my mother and father are fine with this. But I have aunts/cousins/uncles I look up to that I think would dislike Destiny's Bond. Whenever I think about *hopefully* one day having it published, I feel queasy inside about my other family members finding out--they're sure to purchase the book, because that's the kind of thing they do when one of their own has accomplished something they've been working at for years.

 

I'm not letting this stop me, though. True writers write what comes to them from the heart, no matter whether it might displease their friends or family, and share it with the world.

 

My advice is this: Put your work out there. You can't let the opinions of others color what you write or whether you share. If you enjoy writing Erotica, if it brings you satisfaction to write it, then do so. If you feel you have the courage to post it for others to see, then do so. You'll probably get some negative feedback, because there's always someone out there looking to be negative, but you can't let that stop you. I certainly didn't--and I don't regret it at all. Had I not gathered the courage to post Destiny's Bond for peer review on Book Country, I never would have evolved it from an amateur's attempt at fiction into a somewhat *hopefully* decent draft now.

 

Should you post any work for peer review, mention it on this thread and I'll check it out. When it all comes down to it, it's up to you to take the plunge. You have to have the courage to do it. Us here on Book Country will welcome you with open arms and, if necessary, do our best to guide you in learning more about your Craft.

 

I'll be sending you a connection request shortly, so we can message each other, if you'd like.

 

Amber


Lucy Silag - Book Country Director
Posted: Wednesday, July 22, 2015 11:20 AM
Joined: 6/7/2013
Posts: 1356


Hi Diana! Welcome to Book Country! It's great to have you here, and as an erotica writer you are in great company.

 

We had a really cool blog post a while back from another erotica writer, Olivia Glass, called "In Defense of Erotica." Check it out--it might inspire you!


DianaRoseWilson
Posted: Wednesday, July 22, 2015 1:11 PM
Joined: 7/21/2015
Posts: 92


Thank you so much for the feedback and support.  I have been happily surprised at the support the writing community offers.  I think my early days as a writer and young person had me as jaded as my poor character.  The fear of the unknown always feels worse than reality.

 

I decided to take the leap and put the short story up to see how the process goes.  I am also looking forward to reading other works on BookCountry and love the fact that we can make connections with people going through the same struggles.  

 

* adding that I enjoyed reading the article about Erotica. Wonderful stuff!  

--edited by DianaRoseWilson on 7/22/2015, 1:12 PM--


Lucy Silag - Book Country Director
Posted: Wednesday, July 22, 2015 5:49 PM
Joined: 6/7/2013
Posts: 1356


Diana--YAY! So excited for you to post your work.

 

Did you come to the PNWA panel by chance? Cooking and MMA sound familiar . . .


DianaRoseWilson
Posted: Wednesday, July 22, 2015 9:32 PM
Joined: 7/21/2015
Posts: 92


I am pretty excited about the sharing too!  


I was at the PNWA conference and attended a couple panels where you were speaking.  You really did a great job talking about the product too.  I came there in hopes of finding a beta-reader source as one of my wish-list items.  I told my local writing group about Book Country so I hope we'll get some North Bay blood in here.   biggrin


Lucy Silag - Book Country Director
Posted: Thursday, July 23, 2015 2:47 PM
Joined: 6/7/2013
Posts: 1356


*blushing*

 

So glad you found the talk at PNWA helpful. I actually put together a blog post with 6 takeaways from the conference--I wonder what you think. What else did you find interesting there?


DianaRoseWilson
Posted: Thursday, July 23, 2015 3:35 PM
Joined: 7/21/2015
Posts: 92


 

Yes, I saw the post!  I shared it on my outside blog so the local writer folks would get a look at it too.

 

I think having a place for beta readers is so important and it's /hard/ to find them. Even harder to find good beta readers. I have not been at a place in my writing I felt comfortable handing out my story to strangers until this year. The beta reading experience has been very interesting.   I’m looking forward to see what beta readers on the site are like.

 

 

At PNW, I thought all the key note speakers were amazing and uplifting particularly on Friday.  The Writer’s Connection was uplifting on Thursday as was ‘Secrets to Turning Your Dream into a Reality’.  Also enjoyed ‘Writing Outside Your Comfort Zone’.  (I think most of the weekend was outside my comfort zone).   Of course your events were great and helpful as well, I hope you’ve found a lot of people are coming to the site to explore.

 

I'm happy to find Writers are so kind and friendly.


Tricia McKee
Posted: Friday, August 14, 2015 6:39 PM
Joined: 7/7/2015
Posts: 7


I feel like I'm in the same boat, Diana. Is my work contemporary romance, erotic romance, erotica? I don't know. What if I decide later on I'd like to try another genre, should I use a pen name now to make that easier later. Will the industry look down on what I'm writing now if I decide to go another route later.

 

And frankly, the biggest challenge I've faced at this point is the question, "Oh, you're a writer, What type of books do you write?" I am actually fine with this question from family and friends, it's when the Orthopedic surgeon asks, and I stutter a bit and then say "romance," and he said "You mean like Fifty Shades?"

 

Any advice? Anybody?